Link Exchange

So here I am again with one of my frustrations in the webmaster world - link exchangers.

Link exchanging, if done correctly, is a perfectly valid method of building backlinks. However, I receive a few link exchange requests per week, and they are worded so badly. So this article is about the don’ts of link exchanges from my own perspective, drizzled in dry wit and sarcasm.

Be impersonal

I just love it when you make no effort to discover my name. Just call me Sir or Webmaster and I’ll pretend you’re being respectful rather than lazy. Even better, call me Madam, and I can then think you’re appealing to the feminine side of my personality.

Send me a standard letter

Just copy and paste any script you have to try and convince me to exchange links. The less effort you make, the more I feel appreciated. I love spelling and grammar mistakes in standard templates too. Those little mistakes can really make my day.

Link pages

I love nothing more than getting a link to my site that is buried within a deeply nested links page. I feel so valued when you dump a link to my site on a page with 50 other links. If you want to go that extra mile, make sure that there’s no related content on that page. I know for a fact that the Google bots love pages full of links and no content.

Unrelated websites

I think that my site about eco-gadgets or spy gadgets is perfectly suited to your shop about soaps. Please feel free to flatter me that my website is so wonderful and relevant. If you dress up the complements well enough, I might not even notice the obvious difference in niches.

Thank me for my time

Having read your standard script offering a low quality link on a heavily link-saturated links page, I really appreciate it when you thank me for my time. Perhaps I’ll start charging for the 5 seconds of time it takes me to realise that your email offers about as much value as a rotten pile of turd.

Sign off with self-importance

Finally, make sure you finish your email off with your name and job title. If you smother your job title with a high degree of superiority, I will respect you even more! Call yourself a Link Exchange Executive or Backlink Manager to really impress me.

Merry Christmas

I wish all my readers a Merry Christmas, and I hope the above amused you!